RE: This one had me cracking up

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RE: This one had me cracking up

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RE: This one had me cracking up - 5/31/2007 2:41:47 PM

mazda_chick

Posts: 19
Joined: 12/9/2005
Status: offline

All of the jokes were hilarious. Thanks for making my day!!! I would share, but I am not good at it.

(in reply to wsoape281)

Post #: 31

RE: This one had me cracking up - 5/31/2007 3:59:18 PM

87 turbo II

Posts: 1692
Joined: 3/25/2006
From: Atlanta Georgia
Status: offline

Haha no problem. Glad you liked them.

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Post #: 32

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/2/2007 2:32:13 AM

wsoape281

Posts: 1007
Joined: 3/1/2007
Status: offline

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Post #: 33

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/2/2007 2:33:41 AM

wsoape281

Posts: 1007
Joined: 3/1/2007
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Post #: 34

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/2/2007 2:35:30 AM

wsoape281

Posts: 1007
Joined: 3/1/2007
Status: offline

http://server6.pictiger.com/img/215389/fun-and-jokes/sonofabitch.jpg

can't get it to upload straight, but i assure you that it is worth the trip

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Post #: 35

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/5/2007 8:02:46 PM

mazbee

Posts: 66
Joined: 5/25/2007
Status: offline

Another one....

I was driving up the motorway and my boss phoned me and he told me I'd
been promoted. I was so shocked I swerved the car. He phoned me again to
say I'd been promoted even higher and I swerved again. He then made me
managing director and I went right off into a tree. The police came and
asked me what had happened. I said "I careered off the road"

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Post #: 36

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/7/2007 8:55:00 AM

cl8ton

Posts: 240
Joined: 6/1/2007
Status: offline

Just got this one today.
FYI: L.C.B.O is "Liquor Control Board of Ontario"
Enjoy!
Cl8ton

There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand.
This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If
you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT.
This virus will wipe out your private life completely.
If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest L.C.B.O. or BEER store.
Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolating-Neutralizer-Extract (WINE) or Bothersome-Employer-Elimination-Rebooter (BEER).
Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.
You should forward this warning to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

Have a great day and keep smilling ;)

(in reply to zmanzke)

Post #: 37

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/14/2007 9:39:50 AM

rolomac

Posts: 119
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline

Mrs. O'Leery - whose husband Paddy worked the midnight shift at the brewery - woke one night at 2:00am to the sound of somebody knocking on her door. She pulled on her robe, went to the door, and opened it to the brewery supervisor standing there with his hat in his hand. "Mrs. O'Leery", he said, "tis terrible news I have about your husband Paddy. He has fallen into a vat of beer at the brewery and drowned." Gasping at the news, Mrs. O'Leery exclaimed, "Oh, God rest his soul I hope he didn't suffer." "No", said the supervisor, "we don't think he did - he got out three times to pee."

Rolomac

(in reply to cl8ton)

Post #: 38

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/15/2007 9:29:12 AM

cl8ton

Posts: 240
Joined: 6/1/2007
Status: offline

And Another!!! A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The Waitress asks them for their orders.The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order "That will be $9.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke."
The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Again the man reaches into his
pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the
waitress. "No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62."
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir.
How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?"
"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."
"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.
The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?"
The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say."

Have a Good Weekend!

(in reply to rolomac)

Post #: 39

RE: This one had me cracking up - 6/15/2007 9:36:38 AM

87 turbo II

Posts: 1692
Joined: 3/25/2006
From: Atlanta Georgia
Status: offline

That made me laugh^^ I like it!

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Post #: 40